


Koi No Yokan

by FatalViolet520



Series: Beautiful Words (beautiful you) [2]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Friends to Lovers, M/M, and fate happens to bless us love, and you're content, and you're warm and cozy, bc i want there to be :D, curl up with a mug of hot chocolate, feel good fluff, going for the kind of fic where you, honestly just have a good time, is THE BEST WOOCHAN, its just soft, sike there's some angst in the middle bc, soft woochan, there are forces out there bigger than us
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-15
Updated: 2019-01-15
Packaged: 2019-10-10 06:33:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,464
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17420885
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FatalViolet520/pseuds/FatalViolet520
Summary: A whisper into soft brown hair, softer than anything he's ever touched."If fate is praying for us, love, there is very little stopping me from loving you."A breathy giggle into pale skin, limbs intertwined and calmness surrounds them."Pray tell me, what's stopping you?"A look, one look, one that lasts a lifetime, but they have a forever together."You. If you will, I will love you, if not -"A finger over his lips. "I will, darling."





	Koi No Yokan

**Author's Note:**

> bc i need to practice before paint me anndddddddd im a sucker for woochan. i dont k nOw okay but other than that i hope you enjoy!! i am such a hoe for these kinds of romances like,,,, soulmate aus and all that, and u know all the fluffy sap, but like i do want to remind everyone that you are as whole as you can be, you don't need someone else to make you whole, you do not need someone to fix you and love you. your first job is to love yourself for no one else can you love you like you do yourself, and i try to reflect this in my stories. happy 2019, everyone, and i hope this year treats you well <3

[Koi No Yokan](http://www.bbc.com/culture/story/20180103-the-untranslatable-japanese-phrase-that-predicts-love)

  _noun, phrase_

the sense one has upon meeting another person they will fall in love with

 

* * *

 

_ I love you _ . 

 

A promise of a thousand years in the making, countless meetings hundreds and hundreds of times, each time a vow to take care of each other, to love each other until time stops, but they never meet, or it’s not right, or it’s not meant to be.

 

_ I love you _ . 

 

A promise weaved with red string and golden rings, a whisper from the heavens that promises blessings, fate’s soft hand that untangles the delicate string and threads the rings into place for this time. Cupid will not need his arrow anymore. 

 

_ When you are ready _ , she whispers,  _ you will find each other _ . 

 

But even with fate’s intervention, nothing ever happens like it’s supposed to. Perhaps it is for the better.

 

Bang Chan is 16 years old when he first meets a boy called Kim Woojin. He is 16 and he doesn’t know too much, only knows what it’s like to have a crush, only knows that he doesn’t just like girls, only knows a little. Enough, for 16. Because 16 is still young, too young, and he is not ready for what the wheels of fate have in the works for him. 

 

And yet - he  _ still  _ meets Kim Woojin at 16. 

 

Too early, the fates sigh above them.  _ Too soon, too soon _ , a lament of sadness and regret because he’s only 16, and no one is ready at 16. At 16, Chan knows Woojin’s name and his face and a few other things that aren’t important  _ but he remembers them anyway _ , then he’s swept up by high school and college, and all thoughts of love and relationships is thrown out the window when he finds something else to love amidst the whirlwind of growing up and finding himself. 

 

Music. 

 

Music, that will never abandon him; music, that will always be there for him; music, that he can create and craft and make people feel and cry and laugh. Music, because loving music is sometimes easier than loving a person, as he learns by watching his older sister break up with her partner. There are tears and screams and he hugs his sister tightly as he can while she cries, heart breaking into pieces because she still loves them but sometimes love is not enough to make a relationship work.

 

“There are other things, Channie,” His sister tells him in the softness of twilight, “There is trust, and respect, and listening, and being willing to compromise, but not too much at the same time.” Her eyes are swollen red, a small, sad smile on her face, but she has loved, and lost. "Channie, don't forget," She adds, voice tamed with ageing too much in a day, "You are your own person, you don't need someone to be happy, okay? Don't love because you feel like you need to." 

 

_ (is that better to have never loved _ ? chan asks himself, a question he doesn’t know how to answer. she doesn't know about kim woojin, doesn't know about the strange feeling he gets. she doesn't need to know.)

 

Yet he never forgets Kim Woojin, even if he can hardly remember his face or his voice. The name is seemingly burned into his mind even though he can hardly reason why. There’s an uneasy feeling in his chest whenever he remembers Woojin, like he’s missed something, or missed a chance. He remembers Woojin is the randomest things, in the colour blue and a guitar and stuffed toys. Remembers him during storms and sunshine and the thought of him lingers like the sweet aftertaste of candy. 

 

He doesn’t miss Woojin, but at the same time he does. It’s an odd feeling, striking him at the oddest of times, but he’s still okay, he’s still fine, still as whole as a person can be, just as his sister said.

 

Chan thinks Kim Woojin will just be another name he can’t forget.

 

* * *

Kim Woojin is 21 when he meets Bang Chan again. 

 

He doesn’t forget. He remembers the 16 year old him, the 16 year old them, and the stupid little things he can’t forget for some reasons. Like how Chan likes pizza crusts, so he doesn’t eat them so Chan can have them. Like how Chan doesn’t drink coffee yet he manages to stay up to ridiculous hours. Stupid little things that meant he had lingered on to the thought of Chan for five -  _ five _ \- years and it’s now that he meets Chan again. 

 

It’s nothing big. No fireworks, no big moment, no dramatic wind that makes him look up to see the person he couldn’t forget for years standing in front of him. 

 

He meets Chan in the streets, just like that. Recognises him easily even if Chan has grown taller and his hair is blonde.

 

“Oh,” Chan says, surprise in his eyes and a smile etched on his face, “Hi, Woojin-ssi. It’s been a while.” He recognises Woojin too, but Woojin doesn’t think he’s changed too much.

 

“You never called me -ssi,” Woojin says, like he _ remembers _ , “And hello. It’s been - a while.” 

 

Chan just looks at him for a while, then, “Okay, Woojin. You’re back here too?” 

 

Back in their hometown, he means, and Woojin tells him. Tells him that he’s back because he had asked to be transferred back here to be closer to family, and Chan tells him that he’s back to work.  _ Back for good _ , Chan says sheepishly,  _ my home will always be here _ . 

 

And as Woojin looks, as he talks with Chan, the more he recognises the feeling that’s been harbouring in himself for so long, the feeling that had made him hung up on the little things Chan did, that had made him wait an unknowing five years. 

 

It’s the feeling that he will fall in love with Chan. 

 

The revelation isn’t all that surprising, not when Chan smiles at him and says, “You know, I couldn’t forget your name?” Not when he relives Chan’s little quirks and habits. Not when Chan tells him, before they part, that he can’t believe they met again, and he’s so happy to have met him.

 

And Woojin can’t believe it either. Can’t believe that their paths have merged back together, and now he’s 21, he’s older, a bit more experienced, a bit more worn out, he wants to take a chance. 

 

The feeling that he Chan are something of a  _ meant to be _ and not a passed chance grows stronger.

 

* * *

Chan still loves music. Still loves it all these years later and he’s made a living out of loving it, against all odds. There are times when music isn’t enough, but he soldiers through it, weathers his own storms and learns to love himself because no one else can teach him how to do so. 

 

But he learns to love again, learns to love in a different way. 

 

There are rainy days with a small umbrella and wet shoulders; there are sunny days with snapbacks and skateboards; there are quiet days with books and music; there are loud days with laughter and ice cream. Chan learns what it’s like to be happy because of someone else’s happiness, learns what it’s like to love someone who loves him back just as fiercely, learns that he had meant to love Woojin they met, even though he couldn’t quite place that feeling all those years ago. 

 

He learns to love Kim Woojin. 

 

Then, suddenly but not all at once, he finds himself always looking for Woojin, holding his hand, turning to him when he laughs with all his friends. It’s a quiet,  _ oh _ , that sounds in his mind when he’s texting Woojin late one night, the messages bubbling onto his phone as Woojin spams him with excited news about a musician he loves. 

 

“I love you,” He says to his phone, even though Woojin can’t hear him. 

 

It feels right, he thinks as he drifts off to sleep that night. It feels right, sounds right, and it’s like he’s meant to love Woojin since the first time they met. 

 

* * *

But of course things happen, and even though they transition from friends to lovers - they fight. They fight about stupid things - silly things like putting coffee in cereal and who’s going to wash the dishes tonight and where they’ll go for lunch on weekends. They’re human, not perfect. But then one day, they fight, and it’s a real fight, stress and lack of sleeping transferred onto dirty laundry and bank loans, and then Woojin says it. 

 

“I wish I didn’t love you,” He spits, “Then maybe it wouldn’t be so painful, or difficult.” 

 

It’s the first time he’s ever said  _ I love you _ , but Chan, caught up in the middle of anger and stress, doesn’t catch it. 

 

“Fine.” He says, “Fine. If you find me so difficult you can leave. Forget about getting a place together, then,” He adds, and wishes his voice wasn’t shaking. 

 

There’s silence, silence that is too long, too uncomfortable, too thick - then he’s crying, and Woojin’s crying, and they’re slumped on the floor opposite each other, anger having wrought its upper hand over the both of them. Woojin’s tired, so, so tired, the outburst eating away at him and he can’t take it anymore even though it hasn’t been a few minutes. 

 

“I’m sorry I said you were difficult,” Woojin says, voice hoarse and thick with tears, “I didn’t - mean it like that. I - I love you, and I know it’s not the right time to say it, but I do - and I’m sorry. I don’t - I don’t want my life to be easy if I don’t have you. Chan, I’m sorry.” There are more words he wants to say but they’re caught up in him, trapped somewhere between his regret and the look on Chan’s face when he had said that.

 

It doesn’t make it alright immediately, because it’s still something he’s said, something that hurts, something that an apology can’t heal over instantly. But it says something when Chan looks up, vision blurry through tears and bites out, “You - fucking  _ idiot _ . I love you too,” He says, then he says it again, and again, and again, and they fall asleep on the kitchen floor, the same three words repeated to each other, dropped in their ears, for nothing’s easy, but they love each other, and they’ll tough it out. 

 

Even if they are meant to love each other, it isn’t easy.

 

* * *

Still, as far as fights go, it’s not the last one they have, but they learn to communicate, learn to tell each other things and listen to each other. Life still goes on, and time continues to pass, and they grow older, grow a bit wiser, start to feel more like adults and not like teenagers passing as adults. 

 

Now, they’re 26 years young. Still young, still a long way ahead of them, fate whispers, but she has hope. 

 

Now, they’re 26 and they live together, in a small apartment that they can afford only because there’s two of them and it’s pretty cramped, with hardly space to move past each other if they happen to be in the same room, but it’s a house, it’s a space and - they’re together. 

 

It becomes a home for them.

 

Chan comes home to the soft sound of a guitar being played, comes home to bright smiles and warm lights, comes home to someone he knew he’d love since the first day but he’s always, always floored that Woojin loves him back with such equal intensity that it takes his breath away. Home for him becomes that, home becomes being with someone, being with Woojin’s side, and home is an apartment too small and too cold, but it’s only home because Woojin is there. 

 

The thought of them being a forever first occurs to Chan a few months later, when they’re out with their friends. 

 

It goes like this. It’s not a big moment of declaration, but rather a calm thought that rises, then etches itself into his mind. It goes like watching Woojin laugh at his stupid jokes, goes like them sharing food without even asking, goes like their friends sighing when they apparently get too loving, goes like Woojin saying, “Shut up, I love him, so you guys can pipe down until you find someone too.” 

 

Goes like his heart thumping so fast even though it’s well established they love each other. 

 

“I love you,” Chan says, late that night when it’s dark and it’s cold but their bed is warm, “I really, really love you.” He feels rather than sees the smile on Woojin’s lips, and Woojin is so, so warm.

 

“I love you too,” Woojin whispers, only for Chan to hear, breath ghosting over the line of Chan’s neck and shoulder, “I love you so much I’m stupid.” 

 

Even if they don’t say it, they’re a forever.

 

* * *

_ I will always be by your side _ .

 

A vow that Woojin will always keep, as he has done for the past years, time blurring together until he can’t tell how long it’s been, but it’s been so, so long. 

 

_ I will always support and protect you _ . 

 

A vow that Chan swears on his life, in this one and the next, and he will do so with utter contentment. 

 

Above them, fate watches, gentle and soft, the red strings only she can see shining so brightly in the darkness of the mortal realm. She sees their red strings pulsing, the shortest it can ever be, intertwining with the bright gold as they make a promise to love each other till death do them part. 

 

_ I do _ . Breathy and whispered, gaze full of love and an unconstrained smile growing. 

 

_ I do _ . Steady and sure, hands warm, shaking, eyes growing wet with emotion. 

 

They are thousands of centuries finally happy, hundreds of heartbreaks and sadness finally atoned for, a promise that’s finally fulfilled, golden rings shining in the mild sunshine. 

 

Woojin looks over at Chan, glowing and happy and flower petals caught in his hair and - remembers what it’s like to fall in love with him all over again. And if time will let him, if Chan will let him, he’d spend the rest of his life finding things to love about Chan, find ways to fall in love with Chan again and again, find how to make his memories etched with Chan.

 

_ I knew I’d love you when I met you _ , Chan whispers, a confession only for Woojin’s ears, and the feeling that they are meant to be boils over and overflows. 

 

_ I know _ , Woojin says, breathing them against Chan’s lips,  _ I know _ .

 

Tomorrow can wait for them. Fate has played her hand well.  


 

**Author's Note:**

> fun fact i started this series bc im a sucker for pretty words and phrases ;;;; hmu at @stay-serenity on tumblr bc that's where i waste my life <3


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